+44 (0) 1727 847 889

  • Do you frequently get into arguments?
    Do you frequently get into arguments?
  • How are you coming across to your boss?
    How are you coming across to your boss?
  • Are your conversations achieving what you want?
    Are your conversations achieving what you want?
  • Are you getting the best out of your people?
    Are you getting the best out of your people?
  • Does your feedback help people change?
    Does your feedback help people change?
  • Can you allow discussion and still keep control?
    Can you allow discussion and still keep control?

Might this London UK management training course
be useful for your leadership development?

YES if you want leadership skills that'll make you more successful at 

  • using emotional intelligence to calm people down when you're handling tense situations,
  • being assertive in saying what you want, so that people know exactly what's expected of them and what their responsibility is - and speaking with authority but without being authoritarian,
  • saying no  when you need to, firmly but without antagonizing people,
  • listening to people with empathy, even when people are resisting what you want, so that they feel respected and understood,
  • persuading people, overcoming their resistance, delegating to them and coaching them to do what you want them to do,
  • giving effective feedback without making people feel attacked, by being generous when praising and tough and clear when criticising.

What you'll take away from this leadership development training course

You'll receive lots of specific and practical feedback about the effectiveness of your behaviour and style as a leader. You'll be encouraged to experiment with different approaches to handling situations so that you can find out in the safe environment of the course what emotional effect you're having on others, that is, when your approach is winning their cooperation and when it's losing it.

The leadership skills this course will help you develop are the skills of emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is a powerful and universal set of communication skills that are crucial for successful leadership. You'll have sufficient practice and coaching to be able master these leadership skills so that you can retain them after the course. This will increase your confidence and success in managing the most difficult and challenging situations you have to face back at work in your organisation in your leadership role.

Free exploratory coaching session

INTERESTED?

If so, you can have a FREE exploratory coaching session. It'll give you a foretaste of what you can get from the course. You make no commitment to proceed beyond this until you're sure this training is relevant to your own particular need.

How to accept this offer

Simply contact us for a preliminary chat and to arrange your free exploratory coaching session. 

What this session will do for you

In this session we'll aim to give you something practical you can use right away that'll help you handle a difficult situation more successfully at work. All you need do to prepare for this session is think about the kinds of situations you want to be able to handle more successfully.

FAQs

You'll find answers to many of your questions about the content and method of this course under FAQs (in the main menu above).

Want to know more about
this leadership development training?
If so, read on 

Feedback is a key to leadership development 

This leadership development training course is an opportunity to experiment with different ways of handling situations and to receive honest feedback about the effect of your leadership skills on people. 

Is it the effect you intend? If it isn't, you need to know how to change your approach - adapt your leadership skills - in order to get the result you want. You then need to go round the trial and feedback cycle again and again until you are confident in your ability to provide the leadership you want to provide. In addition to teaching you new leadership skills and techniques, it's this trial and feedback cycle that lies at the heart of this leadership development training course. 

It's a highly practical leadership development process. You practise, in a small group, handling the kinds of situations you have to manage at work. You'll see video recordings of yourself in action. You get helpful feedback from other participants. You receive coaching and suggestions from the trainers. You carry on practising and receiving feedback until you've developed your leadership skills as much as you want. You take charge of your own leadership development by this trial and feedback process.

Saying what you want  as leader

The people you're leading need you to make it very clear what you want from them, and they're likely to feel uncomfortable if you don't. The trouble is that many of us learn very early in life that it's unfair, rude, and perhaps punishable to say what we want, because it might clash with or deprive someone else of what they  want.

This may have been part of the necessary and well-meant social training provided by our carers when we were little, but it has resulted in many of us learning that it's safer to keep quiet  about what we want. So this has become one of the underlying beliefs or mental habits that have shaped our personality and relationships and that can de-skill us as leaders. Through fear of conflict we've acquired the habit of suppressing one of the most vital and empowering questions we can ever ask:“What do I really want?” 

That's why one of the key leadership skills you'll practise and master on this leadership development training course is speaking assertively. You can't say what you want if you don't know how to speak assertively. We'll help you find the right words for saying what you want, and we'll get you practising it until you lose your discomfort in doing it.

HOW to say what you want

  • Deep down you probably know what you want. But this quiet inner clarity may be drowned out by the surface noise in your mind. Sometimes it helps to spend time stilling the mind and reflecting quietly on the question, What is it I really want?  Your feelings can guide you to the answer if you allow them
  • When you've connected with it you can say it with the quiet confidence and authority that comes from saying what you know to be true. This is about listening to your own feelings and your own inner voice. It plays a big part in leadership development.

Saying what you DON'T want - saying NO

Just as crucial to leadership development as saying what you DO want is the leadership skill of saying what you DON'T want – saying NO. The reason why saying no  is difficult is that it admits a clash of wills and risks confrontation. When it’s a relationship you care  about the fear of conflict is always hard to handle. But if you can bring those feelings into the conversation they will help find find the courage and integrity you need for saying ‘no’.

HOW to say no

Here's how we'll get you to practise saying no  on this leadership development course:-

  • First, say something positive or appreciative about what you are being asked to do.  And show empathy if you can for person who is asking you and the need that prompts them to ask. 
  • Next, take time to register privately how you feel  about doing it.  You might say, “I need moment to think about it.”  or, “I need a few days to consider it”, or “I need to discuss it with my colleague/ family/ wife/ husband/ partner”.
  • Say honestly how you feel and why, e.g., “I don’t feel right about saying yes, because …”.
  • Wait for their response.
  • If they press you, be firmly assertive but courteous in saying no, e.g., “My decision is no, for the reason I have said.  But thank you for asking.”

Speaking with authority without being authoritarian? 

This leadership development training course will give you a powerful method of being strong and authoritative as a leader without being authoritarian. The authoritarian says, “Do what I say, or else!”  (no reason given - a pretty hostile, aggressive and uncommunicative approach). In contrast, the authoritative manager says, "I want you to ... The reason why I need you to do it is ..." (firm and assertive - but not aggressive).

But what if he meets with resistance? 

This is where he can continue to use the leadership skill of speaking assertively but without repeating himself:-

    • He can say frankly and openly, “What worries me, if you don't do what I want, is the risk to the business”  (again - assertive without being aggressive).
    • Nine times out of ten this leadership skill will work. But if resistance continues, he can continue being assertive but without being hostile: "It surprises and alarms me that you don't seem to care about the risk to the business." 
    • In the event of further resistance (which is very unlikely) he can say, "Now my concern is for YOU. I can't do my job without your cooperation, so if you refuse to do what I want you're putting your own job at risk. I don't want to lose you, because I value you as a member of my team. It's your choice."  (again, frank and honest but neither hostile nor aggressive).

At the heart of this approach is a very effective leadership skill. It will enable you to be authoritative as opposed to authoritarian. It is, simply, saying honestly how you feel, what the feeling is about, and why you feel that way. This is how, on this leadership development training course, you'll be coached to speak assertively.

On this leadership development training course you'll learn how to treat people with respect and understanding even when you disagree with them

Another key leadership skill you'll practise and master on this leadership development training course is listening with empathy. Empathy is paying full attention to what is going on in someone else’s  mind. The difficulty we all have with this is that we are usually distracted by what is going on in our own  mind.

To pay attention to someone else  we must first find a way to flick the switch – to divert our attention from the noise in our own minds, to give ourselves permission to set aside for a while our own sensations, memories, opinions, prejudices, thoughts and feelings, so that we can tune in to what is going on in their  mind. 

Flicking this switch is a deliberate choice. But many of us never make it. We're so engrossed in our own private world that we assume it is the only world there is. If we are interested in others at all it's only in so far as their  thoughts and attitudes relate to our own. We're not interested in their  inner world in its own right. We rarely take the trouble to step with an open mind into their  shoes and try to imagine what their  experience of life is like, what things look like from their  point of view, what matters most to them. We hardly ever do  empathy. But if as a leader you want to be trusted, you can't afford not to listen with empathy.

Other leadership skills you'll acquire on this leadership development training course 

To be successful a leader needs to be good at persuading people, overcoming their resistance, winning their cooperation, delegating, coaching and developing people. The crucial skills needed for these challenging activities are listening with empathy and speaking assertively. These two skills, used in combination, make it hard for people to resist your persuasion. As this is so crucial to any leader's performance, on this leadership development training course we give you a great deal of practice and individual coaching in these two crucial basic leadership skills (for more click Influencing and persuasion, and coaching skills).

Leadership development that equips you for handling tense and emotional situations in a way that calms people down

A central feature of this leadership development training is that it focuses on helping you develop the leadership skills of emotional intelligence.  You'll find much more information on how the course achieves this on the emotional intelligence page.

Leadership development that teaches you how to give strong and successful feedback without making people feel attacked

One of the most powerful leadership skills you'll practice on this leadership development course is the art of giving constructive feedback or criticism. You'll learn how to be more generous when praising and tougher and clearer when criticising. For more on this see our page on feedback training. It's another crucial part of a successful leader's toolkit, and has a central place in our leadership development training course.

Yet another crucial leadership skill you can practise on this leadership development training course

You can't delegate unless know how to develop people and enable them to overcome their difficulties doing what you need them to do. Here is a simple idea you could put to immediate use, and it could give a significant boost to your leadership development.

Do you get extremely frustrated when someone who's undertaken to get something done simply doesn't do it? Do have to chivvy them again and again? And because you've no other way do you sometimes get angry and shout?

If so, you probably feel bad about it and wish there was another way to get what you want with less noise and friction. There is. There's much quieter and more effective way using the leadership skills of assertiveness and empathy. We call it obstacle analysis. Obstacle analysis is a simple but powerful idea for leaders. It's a very successful way of motivating people, by quietly understanding and removing what's getting in the way. It's a powerful coaching tool. You can practise it on this leadership development training course. 

When you're driving down the road and encounter an obstacle you don't try to ram your way through.  You get out, examine the obstacle, and then remove it or find a way round it. If people are failing to do what's expected of them, shouting at them and putting them under pressure is likely to be as successful as trying to force the car through an obstacle in the road. It's far more effective, intelligent, elegant, quicker and causes less friction simply to switch into obstacle analysis mode:- 

The obstacle analysis method of coaching people to fulfil their responsibility

What might the obstacle be that's preventing them from doing what they've said they'll do?  It is very easy to make wrong assumptions, and it's likely, when people fail to do what you're expecting of them, that you've been making wrong assumptions in one of more of the following areas:-

  • Do they understand clearly exactly what's expected of them, why it's necessary, and that they've been given the authority or discretion they need to do it?  Confusion or misunderstanding about this is one of the commonest reasons why things don't get done.
  • Do they know how to do it?  Perhaps not, and if not they need to be shown how. This is another very common obstacle.
  • Are they unwilling for some reason you haven't yet understood because you haven't yet listened well enough? Is someone or something they've no control over preventing them? If so, perhaps they need your help to remove the obstacle.

The beauty of obstacle analysis is that most obstacles are easy to remove once they've been identified. The hardest part of this is not dealing with the obstacle, but identifying it. Listening with empathy  is the leadership skill you need for identifying obstacles. This is another reason why this particular leadership skill is so valuable a part of leadership development. 

We love helping you communicate successfully

By giving you communication skills that'll transform even your most challenging relationships and interactions.

That's the purpose of Skills with People, our training course for managers and professional people at all levels. Thousands have benefited from this course.

Video Introduction

What People Have Said About The Course

Feedback from participant's boss - a Prudential director

He is a lot more confident. At the last meeting of our business unit leaders he fully led the meeting and dealt with people very well.

Read More...
Thank you from a participant

I wanted to let you know that I have secured a new role.  I had to go through an assessment centre and one challenge was to negotiate with a 'belliger ...

Read More...
Sports Centre Manager

I feel that my relationship with other attendees has improved massively following the session. I'd say 9/10 for what I've got from the course as I sa ...

Read More...
Feedback from a participant's boss - a Glaxo SmithKline research director

He has made good progress in two areas: 1. team leadership - he listens with empathy to others well and considers their standpoint as well as his own. ...

Read More...
Senior Resource Consultant, Shell International

“Skills with People” has helped me deal with conflict situations.  It has helped me to diffuse tension in meetings and convert pushback into alignment ...

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - a Johnson & Johnson finance director

He has made excellent progress in the management of his team. He has ensured key stakeholders are involved in decision-making and has gone to great le ...

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - Chairman of White Clarke Group

He has greatly improved his ability to manage a situation. He listens more and uses that information to convince. A good example is the .... group, wh ...

Read More...
EHS advisor (environmental health and safety), Johnson Matthey

This is the best non-techincal course the company has ever put me on because it's the most useful. 

Read More...
Leisure Centre Manager

The most useful part of the course was learning how to convey my disappointment with a member of staff without demotivating them, without making them ...

Read More...
Theatre Manager

Managing to confront them but still maintain their cooperation and support. Previously I was either not confronting or confronting and ending up with ...

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - head of projects in Heinz

He now gains support through his willingness to involve people more and take them with him.

Read More...
Senior Engineer, Qualcomm

An unbelievable experience, highly motivating training and one of the few which stays forever in your mind. A tangible impact to your life and workin ...

Read More...
National Training Index* report on the course

"From delegates reports we have identified Skills with People is a 'highspot' among UK business courses. Delegates mentioned as most helpful the enha ...

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - a Kimberley-Clark marketing director

He is now aware of his need to control his direct approach. He was sometimes too assertive. I think he is now well balanced in this respect.

Read More...
Fundraising Officer, United Nations High Commission for Refugees (UNHCR)

A very intimate training which will make anyone reflect on how best to engage with colleagues when confronted with difficult situations.

Read More...
Learning & Development Coordinator - The Entertainer

I can't recommend this course enough. It has genuinely been the most impactful course I have ever completed. Understanding that I can be assertive w ...

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - a Johnson Matthey Catalysts (Germany) senior manager

There has been a noticeable improvement in the performance of this customer service engineer. He is much more succinct now than he was before. He was ...

Read More...
Golf Club Manager

Ten out of ten for the course for me personally. I think I would have resigned if it hadn't been for the course.

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - A Philips Semiconductors director

To what extend do I think his training need has been satisfied? Completely. I have been approached by 4 peers to tell me that they could see a very po ...

Read More...
Workshop Manager, Professional Plant Services

I now find it easier to have awkward conversations. (As a result of how he has changed several more people from his company are asking to attend the c ...

Read More...
The wife of a participant

"Just thinking about last night’s conversation and it’s bringing tears to my eyes – it’s what I’ve always wanted: to be able to talk with you like tha ...

Read More...
Feedback from a participant's boss - a WS Atkins director

Now he actively listens, probes, asks for clarifications and does not assume anymore he knows the answer.

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - a Billiton director

He's obviously making a positive effort and it does show. People used to be scared of him. No longer.

Read More...
Project Quality Engineer (self funding)

A lesson for life! The power of effective communication is incredible when one masters the skills "listen with empathy" / "speak assertively". Defin ...

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - an HSBC investment director

I have had three unprompted comments from different team members and colleagues who have been surprised at the consideration he has shown in helping s ...

Read More...
Feedback from a participant's boss - a Shell International senior manager

He is showing far more self-awareness and more restraint in potentially confrontational situations. He is far more aware of the impact his actions and ...

Read More...
Feedback from a participant's boss - a Merck Sharp & Dohme medical director

She feels more confident in tackling people and has been impressed with her new found techniques, e.g., in dealing with members of the marketing depar ...

Read More...
Feedback from participant's boss - a Johnson & Johnson marketing director

She has become increasingly aware and focussed on ensuring she is gaining cooperation from colleagues by the way she approaches situations. E.g., Meet ...

Read More...

Examples of Training Needs Met

Very diligent but hated dealing with difficult people Read More...
Preparing for a more challenging role Read More...
Very logical but not creating enough rapport Read More...
Enormous enthusiasm but little sensitivity Read More...
Well intentioned but demoralising his team Read More...
Flying high but creating a tense atmosphere Read More...
Being more assertive would help career go better Read More...
Technically very sound but lacking persuasive skills Read More...
Forceful communicator who created friction Read More...
Had a positive attitude but gave a negative impression Read More...
Respected specialist who was too quiet at meetings Read More...
Allowed his meetings to get out of hand Read More...
Difficulty communicating with non-technical people Read More...
Lots of energy and ideas but little attention for his clients Read More...
Not delegating or developing others Read More...

Need To Know The Quick Facts?