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  • Do you frequently get into arguments?
    Do you frequently get into arguments?
  • Does your feedback help people change?
    Does your feedback help people change?
  • Are you getting the best out of your people?
    Are you getting the best out of your people?
  • Are your conversations achieving what you want?
    Are your conversations achieving what you want?
  • How are you coming across to your boss?
    How are you coming across to your boss?
  • Can you allow discussion and still keep control?
    Can you allow discussion and still keep control?

Might this London UK
EQ training course be relevant for you?

What is EQ training?

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is a set of skills and characteristics that are closely correlated to leadership performance.  They include the way people handle relationships and conversations which can be dramatically handicapped if handled clumsily becuase of a lack of awareness of the other person's state of mind.  This EQ training course provides a set of skills that can be learnt and rehearsed.  Just like any other skill, the more one practices the better one becomes at handlling difficult conversations.

The skills of emotional intelligence (EQ) taught on this EQ training course can help people to connect better more successfully with others, which is particularly challenging when one or more people involved are under emotional pressure.  Emotionally charged situations, scenarios or relationships can trigger either person in an interaction to become defensive and irrational. Utilising the skills taught on this EQ training course you can learn to speak firmly, clearly, with integrity so that other people take what you are saying seriously, while at the same time can feel respected and understood.

Our EQ training offers the ability to be able to communicate in a way that helps conversations become calm, rational and safe even in emotionally charged situations.

An example of where EQ training could be useful at work

Here is a typical example of someone who attended our EQ training course because they were having difficulties putting people’s backs up when they didn’t agree.  This may resonate with you, or may remind you of someone else who might benefit from EQ training.

The problem (why was EQ training being recommended / suggested)

A manager with a reputation for being a hard man.  Had a reputation for being able to achieve results in a tough industry.  The trouble was that his aggressive approach did not go down well with colleagues in the management team, and when an opportunity for promotion came up the job was given to someone more diplomatic who already had plenty of EQ.  He took this to heart and tried to be less aggressive.  The trouble then was that he felt inhibited about expressing himself and so he began to feel disheartened.  His manager thought that some EQ training might help him connect better with other people.

The diagnosis (how was the manager's lack of EQ getting in his way?)

He was a courageous man who set a high value on telling the truth without compromise.  He had plenty of good ideas and most of what he said made good sense.  But when disagreeing with someone he would say, for example, “You’re wrong,”, “What you should do is . . . .”  And he rarely showed any interest in other people’s ideas.  The result was that he was putting his colleagues’ backs up and they found it easy to dismiss what he said on the grounds that, “he was just being argumentative”.  It was easy for them not to take him seriously.  What he needed was to replace the habit of expressing opinions in a divisive and argumentative manner with a different more emotionally intelligence approach.  With some EQ training he’d be much more likely to be able to create an atmosphere of mutual understanding and respect in which it would be much easier for him to achieve a meeting of minds with his colleagues. 

The remedy (how was EQ training able to support this manager)

He first needed to be helped to see for himself the fruitlessness of the aggressive approach – in other words, that by putting people’s backs up his was making it easy for them to dismiss his ideas.  This was done by showing him a video recording of one of his typical conversations. He quickly took the point.  Then he needed to be shown and to practise two EQ skills that would enable him to be even more forceful than before but without putting his colleagues on the defensive.  The first was to be assertive instead of aggressive.  Instead of using an aggressive way of speaking, for example, “your suggestion is rubbish”, he needed to learn (with the help of EQ training) a no less forceful but much less argumentative way of speaking, for example, “what alarms me about your suggestion is . . . .”  This would make it harder for people to dismiss what he had to say because it wouldn’t seem like an attack.  The second skill was equally crucial, namely, the skill of listening with empathy to his colleagues concerns.  As well as saying, for example, “what alarms me about your suggestion is …,”  he needed to show he was trying to understanding and empathise with his colleagues, for example, “I imagine the reason you made that suggestion is that you are worried about . . . .”  

What were the mental obstacles to change (i.e. what makes EQ training challenging)

It was not easy for him to learn these EQ communication skills on this EQ training course because it was so fundamentally different from the approach he was in the habit of using. Two long-held assumptions were in the way.  The first was his belief that feelings are weaknesses and that if you reveal them people will take advantage of you.  This is untrue but until he was able to let go of the belief he couldn’t use the kind of assertive language practiced on this EQ training course (illustrated in the paragraph above).  The second mental obstacle was his belief that to show understanding or “empathy” to someone is also a sign of weakness because it is the same thing as agreeing with them.  This is also incorrect, but he had to learn for himself in the process of going through the programme on this EQ training course that it is possible to try to understand someone without agreeing with them and without compromising your own position.

Was the EQ training successful?

In spite of the obstacles and the initial strangeness of the new approach, after a few months of practice he began to feel at home with it and it began to made a big difference to his relationships and his effectiveness at work.  The EQ training had been a success.  He was able to connect better with others, stand up for what he believed, say exactly what he thought, was able to be honest about how he felt, and all whilst maintaining a healthy rapport with other people, and not putting their backs up.

Free exploratory coaching session

INTERESTED?

If so, you can have a FREE exploratory coaching session. It'll give you a foretaste of what you can get from the course. You make no commitment to proceed beyond this until you're sure this training is relevant to your own particular need.

How to accept this offer

Simply contact us for a preliminary chat and to arrange your free exploratory coaching session. 

What this session will do for you

In this session we'll aim to give you something practical you can use right away that'll help you handle a difficult situation more successfully at work. All you need do to prepare for this session is think about the kinds of situations you want to be able to handle more successfully.

FAQs

You'll find answers to many of your questions about the content and method of this course under FAQs (in the main menu above).

We love helping you communicate successfully

By giving you communication skills that'll transform even your most challenging relationships and interactions.

That's the purpose of Skills with People, our training course for managers and professional people at all levels. Thousands have benefited from this course.

What People Have Said About The Course

Feedback from participant's boss - a Johnson Matthey Catalysts (Germany) senior manager

There has been a noticeable improvement in the performance of this customer service engineer. He is much more succinct now than he was before. He was ...

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Project Quality Engineer (self funding)

A lesson for life! The power of effective communication is incredible when one masters the skills "listen with empathy" / "speak assertively". Defin ...

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Feedback from participant's boss - A Philips Semiconductors director

To what extend do I think his training need has been satisfied? Completely. I have been approached by 4 peers to tell me that they could see a very po ...

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Senior Engineer, Qualcomm

An unbelievable experience, highly motivating training and one of the few which stays forever in your mind. A tangible impact to your life and workin ...

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The wife of a participant

"Just thinking about last night’s conversation and it’s bringing tears to my eyes – it’s what I’ve always wanted: to be able to talk with you like tha ...

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Thank you from a participant

I wanted to let you know that I have secured a new role.  I had to go through an assessment centre and one challenge was to negotiate with a 'belliger ...

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Feedback from participant's boss - a Prudential director

He is a lot more confident. At the last meeting of our business unit leaders he fully led the meeting and dealt with people very well.

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Feedback from participant's boss - a Johnson & Johnson marketing director

She has become increasingly aware and focussed on ensuring she is gaining cooperation from colleagues by the way she approaches situations. E.g., Meet ...

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Sports Centre Manager

I feel that my relationship with other attendees has improved massively following the session. I'd say 9/10 for what I've got from the course as I sa ...

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Workshop Manager, Professional Plant Services

I now find it easier to have awkward conversations. (As a result of how he has changed several more people from his company are asking to attend the c ...

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Fundraising Officer, United Nations High Commission for Refugees (UNHCR)

A very intimate training which will make anyone reflect on how best to engage with colleagues when confronted with difficult situations.

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Learning & Development Coordinator - The Entertainer

I can't recommend this course enough. It has genuinely been the most impactful course I have ever completed. Understanding that I can be assertive w ...

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EHS advisor (environmental health and safety), Johnson Matthey

This is the best non-techincal course the company has ever put me on because it's the most useful. 

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Feedback from participant's boss - head of projects in Heinz

He now gains support through his willingness to involve people more and take them with him.

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Feedback from participant's boss - a Kimberley-Clark marketing director

He is now aware of his need to control his direct approach. He was sometimes too assertive. I think he is now well balanced in this respect.

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Feedback from a participant's boss - a Shell International senior manager

He is showing far more self-awareness and more restraint in potentially confrontational situations. He is far more aware of the impact his actions and ...

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Feedback from participant's boss - a Billiton director

He's obviously making a positive effort and it does show. People used to be scared of him. No longer.

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Feedback from participant's boss - an HSBC investment director

I have had three unprompted comments from different team members and colleagues who have been surprised at the consideration he has shown in helping s ...

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National Training Index* report on the course

"From delegates reports we have identified Skills with People is a 'highspot' among UK business courses. Delegates mentioned as most helpful the enha ...

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Feedback from participant's boss - a Johnson & Johnson finance director

He has made excellent progress in the management of his team. He has ensured key stakeholders are involved in decision-making and has gone to great le ...

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Golf Club Manager

Ten out of ten for the course for me personally. I think I would have resigned if it hadn't been for the course.

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Feedback from a participant's boss - a Merck Sharp & Dohme medical director

She feels more confident in tackling people and has been impressed with her new found techniques, e.g., in dealing with members of the marketing depar ...

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Feedback from participant's boss - Chairman of White Clarke Group

He has greatly improved his ability to manage a situation. He listens more and uses that information to convince. A good example is the .... group, wh ...

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Senior Resource Consultant, Shell International

“Skills with People” has helped me deal with conflict situations.  It has helped me to diffuse tension in meetings and convert pushback into alignment ...

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Feedback from a participant's boss - a WS Atkins director

Now he actively listens, probes, asks for clarifications and does not assume anymore he knows the answer.

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Leisure Centre Manager

The most useful part of the course was learning how to convey my disappointment with a member of staff without demotivating them, without making them ...

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Feedback from a participant's boss - a Glaxo SmithKline research director

He has made good progress in two areas: 1. team leadership - he listens with empathy to others well and considers their standpoint as well as his own. ...

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Theatre Manager

Managing to confront them but still maintain their cooperation and support. Previously I was either not confronting or confronting and ending up with ...

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Examples of Training Needs Met

Technically very sound but lacking persuasive skills Read More...
Allowed his meetings to get out of hand Read More...
Preparing for a more challenging role Read More...
Flying high but creating a tense atmosphere Read More...
Being more assertive would help career go better Read More...
Very logical but not creating enough rapport Read More...
Respected specialist who was too quiet at meetings Read More...
Lots of energy and ideas but little attention for his clients Read More...
Forceful communicator who created friction Read More...
Not delegating or developing others Read More...
Difficulty communicating with non-technical people Read More...
Had a positive attitude but gave a negative impression Read More...
Enormous enthusiasm but little sensitivity Read More...
Well intentioned but demoralising his team Read More...
Very diligent but hated dealing with difficult people Read More...

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