Ready to Get Started?
- As a taster I'm offering a free training video covering one of the most popular training needs,
- "How to give honest feedback without causing offence“.
- Plus: I’ll also send you a set of case studies that will show you the typical sorts of people who have attended our training and benefited from what they learnt.
After that, if you’d like to take a deeper dive and explore how you can personally make best use of these skills, I’m offering you a FREE initial coaching session to help you assess whether this training can help you become really good at dealing with people, especially in the situations you are currently finding hardest to handle successfully.
Is this training course right for you?
Proven training for managers, leaders and professionals who want to
be confrontative, demanding, firm, forceful, tough and uncompromising
when necessary ... but without conflict
- Make demands in a way that makes it unlikely people will refuse you.
You'll get what you want more often, so have more job satisfaction.
- Say what you REALLY want without playing it down.
You'll stand a greater chance of getting what you REALLY want, so your power and success will grow.
- Stop apologising for what you want.
You'll sound much more positive, so other people will take you more seriously.
- Don't hold back from setting high standards.
You'll motivate people better, so be a better leader.
- Be uncompromising in what you want from people.
You'll bring out the best in both you and them, so you'll be much happier at work.
- Become more aware of some of your self-doubts and guilt that holds you back from being as effective as you could be.
Without self-doubt and guilt you'll be much more confident and successful.
- If you're a woman working in a male dominated environment find a subtler way to influence others than by behaving like an aggressive man.
You'll meet less resistance, and you needn't pretend to be someone other than who you are.
- Be clear in telling people what you REALLY want.
This will avoid misunderstandings, and it produces better teamwork.
- Don't let go of what you want just because somebody else resists.
Hold on until you achieve it. People will take you more seriously.
- Stop being a pushover. When necessary be firm, forceful, demanding, tough and uncompromising.
You'll be more successful and much more likely to get what you want. By being true to yourself you set an example of integrity.
- Become uncompromisingly tough, but never without showing respect for others.
This will get you much more cooperation instead of conflict, so your relationships will improve.
Are you sick and tired of worrying about confronting people?
Arrange a free initial coaching session and develop your confidence to insist on high standards now!
What you'll take away from this course
Might your need to be more demanding or forceful be met through this London UK management training and leadership development course called Skills with People?
- Assertiveness skills that encourage and motivate without making people defensive.
- How to confront people safely without antagonising them.
- You'll be more demanding or forceful when people are reluctant to do what you want, but without being aggressive.
- You'll be able to be truly assertive. Normally being assertive is a simple and effective way of being firm with people without antagonising them - but as well as this you'll have the additional power of the assertive ratchet.
- You'll develop your leadership skills so that you can become good at motivating and inspiring without provoking people into becoming defensive or discouraged using emotional intelligence.
- We'll coach you so you know exactly what to say, and how to say it so that you can confront others WITHOUT argument, and resolve any disagreements successfully.
Are you a manager, leader or a professional wanting confidence to put your foot down?
Arrange a free initial coaching session and we'll show you how - now!
A practical guide - how to be more demanding
How emotional intelligence can help you be more demanding ... and get away with it
The assertive ratchet
There's a powerful method of being demanding and forceful without antagonising people. We call it the assertive ratchet, and it's one of the things you'll learn on this course.
The assertive ratchet is a way of being increasingly assertive without being aggressive when someone seems to be refusing to do what you want. It's a courteous way of standing your ground and being increasingly demanding and forceful when the need arises.
A ratchet is an instrument you can tighten up notch by notch if necessary in order to prevent what you are gripping from slipping out of your grip. Assertiveness can be used like a ratchet if at first you don't succeed in getting the other person to do what you want.
Example - how to use the assertive ratchet
The example involves Anita. She's talking to an unwilling colleague. Put yourself in his shoes and try to imagine her effect on him each time she uses the ratchet:-
- ANITA: Paul, you remember those figures I asked you for? Are they ready for me yet?
- PAUL: What figures? No, I'm far too busy. They'll have to wait.
This is the moment for her to be assertive, by putting how she feels into words and explaining succinctly why she feels this way
- ANITA: That’s worrying. If I don't get them in the next two days I’ll miss the customer’s deadline.
- An honest, clear and assertive response like this is usually very effective. Nine times out of ten the person who receives it will find it very hard to resist. But to illustrate how the ratchet works let's imagine he does resist:-
- PAUL: So what?
Now she can ratchet her assertiveness up one notch by saying once again saying how his response makes her feel, and why
- ANITA: I’m shocked. You seem to be saying you don’t care if we lose a customer.
- Notice she doesn’t argue, which would make it easy for him to argue back. She simply makes him aware how his response makes her feel and why. Again, an honest, clear assertive approach like this will normally bring him to his senses. But let's imagine he continues to be difficult:-
- PAUL: Why don’t you go away and stop pestering me? Haven’t you anything better to do?
Now she rachets up another notch
- ANITA: Now I’m even more concerned, Paul, because you seem to be refusing to cooperate, and without your cooperation I can’t do my job.
Again she doesn’t argue. Instead, she ratchet's up another notch, focuses on how she feels right now, and why.
If he goes on refusing she can ratchet up to the final notch
- ANITA: Now my concern is about you. If you go on refusing you give me no choice but to go over your head to the director, and that could be bad for you. I've no wish to make things bad for you.
It is very unlikely she'll need to go this far, but the knowledge that she can if necessary gives her the strength to stand her ground.
Summary of how use the assertive ratchet
Notice how she stays very alert as the conversation moves forward. She never once needs to argue or repeat herself. Once she's spoken assertively she moves on, focusing on the next and more immediate issue as soon as it arises. In this way she progressively increases the risk he is taking, but at every step she gives him another chance to change his mind. You need to be on your toes to use the assertive ratchet, but it is satisfyingly effective, and it defines how to be assertive:-
- Use your feelings, because they're your most reliable source of personal power and authority.
- Speak the truth.
- Be clear and firm.
- Don’t argue.
- There’s no need to be aggressive.
- Be economical with words.
- All you have to do at each moment of the conversation, if you can be quick-witted enough to do it, is tell the truth about how you feel, what about and why.
This method needs a lot of practice, and that's what you'll get on this course on how to be more demanding or forceful. This is a great way to develop the confidence to stand up to people and be more demanding and forceful when they're being difficult. At no point in this conversation need you antagonise them or argue with them.
Discover the exact steps you need to take
to say what you REALLY want (and what you DON'T want),
Why a FREE initial coaching session will help you
- Have a foretaste of what you can get from the course.
- It's a no commitment way to see if this training is relevant for you.
- Gently explore in a safe, un-pressured atmosphere where we can diagnose your training needs, answer any questions and give you something practical you can use right away that'll help you handle a difficult situation more successfully at work.
- Learn what to say, and how to say it to achieve the results you want.
- Click here for more information