Might this assertiveness training course in London
raise your sights about what you can achieveas a manager?
YES it might, if you really want to be able to
- put your point over in such a way that people recognise you really mean what you say and take you more seriously,
- be assertive without putting others down, getting into arguments, creating scenes or damaging your reputation,
- speak up for yourself with integrity and in a calm, and clear and courteous way that commands attention and respect, especially in tricky situations such as managing conflict or disagreement.
Video - An introduction to our assertiveness course (3 minutes)
What you'll take away from this training
Assertiveness training is one of a small set of communication skills vital to anyone in a managerial or leadership position. This assertiveness training course will give you simple techniques enabling you to take a firm stand under pressure and be taken seriously, to avoid being submissive, but without antagonizing others or getting a bad reputation. You'll be able make individuals understand clearly what you want, and - just as crucial - what you don't want, by being more demanding or forceful. You'll be able to put your foot down and saying no when you need to. Our assertiveness training will help you develop a way of breaking bad news more skilfully, as well as building or creating rapport swifly with language you’ll feel comfortable using. Being able to find the right words can’t fail to build your self-confidence and expand your vision of what you can achieve as a manager and leader.
Why as a manager might I need these classes?
Assertiveness skills training are one of *the two crucial skills* you need for managing the most challenging situations you face as a manager or leader, such as dealing with aggressive individuals and managing difficult people. It's how you give effective feedback, tell others where you stand, what you want, what you don't want, what you're pleased and satisfied with and what you're dissatisfied or concerned about. It's as necessary for managing upwards as for managing downwards.
If you don't know how to be assertive you'll find it tricky to stand up against bullying, or say no to someone. You'll struggle to set high standards and hold individuals to those standards. If you can’t be assertive you have to resort to either to pleading with people or to trying to force them to do what you want, neither of which are very successful ways of winning their confidence, trust and cooperatio
What's the difference between assertiveness and aggression?
The word assertiveness is often confused with aggression. Both assertiveness and aggression are ways of avoiding being submissive or passive. But aggressive behaviour is different from assertive behaviour. Aggression puts others on the defensive because they experience it as an attack, and it’s not transparently honest. Of course the feelings behind it may well be genuine, but because you're not openly admitting them it makes others fear and mistrust you. On this assertiveness training course we’ll help you master the art of being strongly assertive but without being aggressive.
*What's the other crucial skill* in any training courses on assertiveness?
In addition to being assertive, the other crucial skill a manager needs is empathy - listening skill. It doesn't make sense to make managers more assertive without also developing their empathy. These two crucial communication skills are at the heart of emotional intelligence. These assertiveness skills provides a powerful combination of assertiveness training and listening (or empathy) training. Once you've mastered these two skills there'll be very few situations you can't handle successfully. That's why they're so confidence building.
That's why this assertiveness training teaches you both skills. Together they form the basic tool kit you need for managing conflict and disagreement, for influencing and persuading, and for carrying people with you in times of change.
What two keys to assertiveness will this training give you?"
- One key to assertiveness is to learn to recognise your own feelings and giving yourself permission to admit them - own up to them - speak about them, e.g.,"I'm angry", "I'm worried", "I'm frustrated", "I'm disappointed", "I'm delighted", "I'm relieved", "I'm full of admiration", "I'm satisfied", "I'm not confident".
If you try to keep the lid on negative feelings they're likely to build up a head of steam and explode or leak out in the form of aggression. Admitting them is a safe way of letting off steam and avoiding explosions and leaks. Openly admitting you're angry with someone is not the same as attacking them. In fact it's a way of avoiding attack. And it helps you be more true to yourself and give the other person access to what's going on in your mind.
- The other key to being asertiveness is empathy. It enables you to connect with what's going on in the other person's mind.
Assertiveness without empathy is unbalanced, one-sided. If all you do is talk about your own feelings, and pay no attention of the other person's, your assertiveness comes across as an attack.
Both skills are necessary for building and improving relationships, managing developing teams and team members, engaging in creative problem solving, lateral thinking and constructive dialogue with colleagues about business stragegies, use of resources, getting others to accept solutions to problems, and conflict resolution.
Practise these two skills is a wonderful way of improving your self-confidence. It also develops your emotional intelligence.
On this training course you'll learn precisely what words to use
Here are the guidelines this course will give you for speaking with assertiveness, and below is an example. In the protected environment of the course you'll practise saying, as briefly as you can, three specific and true things about yourself (you can say them without fear of contradiction becaus you happen to be the world's highest authority on the subject):-
- 1. How you feel (Name the feeling. You can use positive feelings, e.g., “I’m very pleased”, “I’m totally satisfied”, or negative ones, e.g., “I’m disappointed”, “I’m not happy”, “I’m extremely concerned”, “I’m alarmed”.)
- 2. What about (What specific event or experience you are referring to.)
- 3. The reason why (What underlying need, belief or difficulty of yours has caused you to react in this way. In other words, what really matters to you.)
Then pause and wait. The pause adds power to your words. Watch and listen with close attention to the response. Allowing sufficient pauses in the conversation is one of the crucial skills you'll practise on this course.
How you can use the method taught on this course in real life"
You can use this approach to complain in a restaurant, without being aggressive, rude or making a scene. Many others are so uncomfortable in this situation that they can’t bring themselves to speak up, but if you do it this way it's far less uncomfortable:-
- Simply say in a quiet but clear voice, “Waiter, I’m disappointed. It’s my steak. I ordered it rare because that’s how I prefer it”, followed by silence in which you keep a straight face and wait for a response.
- You're making it very difficult for the waiter to do anything other than say, “I’m sorry, Sir/Madam. I’ll order you another one right away.”
Interested? Arrange a FREE exploratory coaching session
If so, you can have a FREE exploratory coaching session. It'll give you a foretaste of what you can get from the course. You make no commitment to proceed beyond this until you're sure this training is relevant to your own particular need.
How to accept this offer
Simply contact us for a preliminary chat and to arrange your free exploratory coaching session.
What this session will do for you
In this session we'll aim to give you something practical you can use right away that'll help you handle a difficult situation more successfully at work. All you need do to prepare for this session is think about the kinds of situations you want to be able to handle more successfully.
You'll find answers to many of your questions about the content and method of this course under FAQs (in the main menu above).
Price, dates and location of our upcoming public courses
For details of our upcoming public courses see course dates.